Dear Friends,
Over the past few weeks, we’ve been reminding you of the four talent needs foundational to the work we do at The Waymakers Change Group. We’ve covered the needs to feel seen, to be respected, and to be valued. Today, we’ll examine the need to feel protected.
Protection at work may sound like a strange concept, but truly inclusive workplaces can’t exist when people feel unsafe. And in this time of unprecedented political and social division, workplaces have become land mines for microaggressions, misunderstandings, and missed opportunities.
Let’s see how two leaders engage in a workplace protection scenario in the following story shared with us during an employee listening session with a client. As you’re reading, think about how the leaders’ actions impacted others in the moment. Then think about what the long-term impacts of this interaction might be.
The Story: Feeling Protected at Work
On break from a training session, I found myself the lone Black woman senior leader in a circle of White women executives. Taking the opportunity to get to know each other better, we started talking about everything other than work—kids, grandkids, fitness efforts, shoes… And then the conversation turned to hair. One executive looked directly at me and said, “I straighten my hair every morning. I think curly hair in the workplace is completely unprofessional.”
I looked around at others to make sure I’d heard her correctly. A couple of women looked away, one looked down at her shoes. Another darted for a refill of her coffee. Surely this executive was not directing her comment at ME—a Black woman with VERY curly, very coily natural hair. Just as I began to feel a flush of embarrassment, another executive woman in our little circle spoke up: “I don’t think hair has much to do with being professional,” she said, while calmly stirring her coffee. Then she looked directly at her peer and said, “Tell me more about why you feel curly hair is unprofessional.”
I was stunned. The situation was getting even more awkward, but at least the focus was now on the rude executive and not on me. She stammered and tried to come up with an answer, but was at a loss. Another executive then chimed in, “I don’t care if someone has purple hair, blue hair, or is bald. If they’re good to people and great at their job, that’s professional in my book.” Nods and yeses from the circle followed and the subject was changed. At some point, the rude executive walked away.
After the next training segment, the executive who came to my aid sought me out. “There’s zero tolerance for that kind of thing here. Especially in my presence. Are you okay?”
I was shaken by the experience, for sure, but it taught me some valuable lessons: 1. There are narrow-minded people everywhere—even at our company. 2. I know who I never want to work for, and 3. There are some good leaders here who are willing to risk their own comfort to make sure others feel safe. I appreciate that. I appreciate her. Still.
The Solution: Build Skills to Ensure Protection
Feeling protected at work looks like support, the freedom to contribute without needing to be perfect, and intervention during moments of harm—like in the experience above. How do you think the leaders who experienced that exchange felt? They surely felt the tension and “dis-ease”—their body language was evidence of that. Maybe some wanted to speak up but didn’t know how. Maybe some felt the same way about curly hair in the workplace. If so, what did they take away from those moments? They would know that while they were entitled to their own opinions, wielding them to shame others would not be tolerated, and that they would be held accountable. Publicly.
In a previous newsletter, we shared that to encourage workplace protection, leaders can establish and abide by psychological contracts, root out toxicity by immediately addressing unacceptable behavior, and solicit feedback on their own performance from their teams. But those actions aren’t easy for everyone. To better prepare, leaders can strengthen three skills important to nurturing protection in the workplace: self-awareness, humility, and caring.
Self-awareness
Understanding how your own thoughts, emotions, and actions do or do not align with your internal standards.
Why do you behave the way you do? How do your actions or inactions impact others? If you cause injury, do you follow up? Developing self-awareness is key to genuine human connection and requires introspection. Get to know your values and motivations. Be willing to adapt when needed.
Humility
An awareness that one is not more important than another; a lack of hubris that makes way for personal growth.
As a fellow Waymaker, Pepper Miller, likes to say, “Different does not mean deficient” and she is so right. Don’t assume that your way—your way of doing things at work, of living or believing, of loving or being—is the only way. Make room for the right ways of others. Listen more than you talk and reflect on what you hear. Don’t judge. Instead, be present and mindful. Look for ways to honor others and yourself. That’s when growth happens.
Caring
Consideration for and appropriate response to the unique hopes, needs, and concerns of others.
There’s a lot of talk right now about leaders being kind instead of being nice. Leaders can’t be kind if they don’t care about others. What does caring look like at work? It looks like being first to say hello, to invite someone for coffee, to a meeting or onto a new project. It looks like recognizing personal life events—birthdays and anniversaries, yes, but also the loss of a parent or pet. It means knowing what others want and acting genuinely to help bring that about. Caring means being others-oriented; treating them the way they want to be treated.
If the “rude” executive in the personal story we shared had developed her self-awareness, her sense of humility, and if she were others-oriented, she never would have said what she said. But she did. What could she have done to make it right? If you answered “apologize,” you’re right. We’re all human and we all make mistakes, especially in relationships. The key is to apologize for our missteps, mean it, and put in the work—the self-reflection and behavior modification—to not let missteps happen again.
Friends, protection at work is built or torn down by our daily choices, behaviors, and interactions. Protection influences everything—relationships, culture, and business outcomes. What happens to innovation when people feel free to share unorthodox approaches or ideas? What happens to teamwork and loyalty when employees know their peers have their backs and will intervene to disrupt workplace harm? Everything flourishes when employees feel protected. Everything!
In our next newsletter, we’ll show you how better meeting the four talent needs for all people can pave The Way to Workplace Wellness with increased employee contribution and improved business outcomes.
Until then, keep making a way.
The Waymakers Change Group